Rats in the night

Man, last night Lil woke us up -- a yucky rat had bitten through the hose behind the fridge and water was spraying everywhere. Larry killed the rat, Lorna cleaned up the mess.

I panicked.

;-)

We were up all night, slept in, and today's been weird, all day.

so, the couch is *way* bigger than it looked in the store

Much bigger.

It's fabulous.

Red.

Fun.

But bigger than anticipated...

Shin splints and a general blah

I am feeling very blah today -- no reason, really. I just am.

My leg hurts and I don't want to go to the trainers and yoga. I don't want to walk the dogs or do the laundry.

I don't want to get my word count and do my job.

I don't want to be a grown up.

*stomp*

*throw things*

*do my shawnzilla impersonation*

*ragemaimkilldestroywavearmsmadlyinaterrifyingfashion*

*chuckles*

Okay, now that *that* particular stompy-whiny-cry-baby stuff is over...

I'm tired of exercising

I'm not stopping; I'm just tired of it. ;-)

Okay?

Okay.

Today was a *lot* of exercising and running still sucks. I keep waiting for the rush. I think it's a lie.

finished an art quilt

finished a spin class.

finished reading 4 books.

started my period. ;-)

Finally.

Exhausted today

In a bone-deep, I could just sob sort of way.

If my period doesn't start soon, I'm going to become homicidal.

Just sayin'

I dreamed my dog got eaten by a bear

Bizarre, given the relatively small native central Texas bear population, but there you are.

I spend the first 1/2 hour of my day drinking coffee and working on art. It's a thing. It works for me, usually.

Today I was working on a little white doll, embroidering her face and attaching it, sewing on sparkly things, etc. Every time I thought about work (which, I admit, is a whole lot because dude, busy), I dropped the damn needle.

No, seriously. La la la I'm sewing in eyes, I think about production, boom. Lalala I'm fashioning a mouth, I think about assholes, crash.

In the middle I burst into tears, kicked the file cabinet, and found the needle again (fortunately, part of the lessons the universe was attempting to teach me this morning did *not* involve losing the needles or poking myself with the needles or stepping on the needles). By the end, her face was attached, her belly was sparkly, and and I was not thinking about work.

Hell, by the end, when I went into the sewing room to run her body through the machine, discovered that my needle was broken, the bobbin was empty, and the timer on my 30 minutes had just run out?

I could laugh.

*stretches*

Man, the trainer was good today -- hard, but good.

I'm trying to work, but it's not working. I just want to read or sleep or run around in circles.

This is because I'm hormonal, I know it.

It doesn't make it better, but I know it.

blah

*flips off the world*

;-)

Happy Birthday to me

Good day.

Yoga.

Julie and Julia.

Roast chicken.

Tom kum ga.

Makeup, new pants, and a book about multimedia techniques for fiber arts.

Life is good.

not in a blogging mood

so I'll just growl and wave and go.

;-)

I swam, I shopped, I watched football

I worked, I wrote, I took a lot of muscle relaxants.

Tomorrow? Zumba, getting my hair done, buying a racing bike, and writing.

:D

Yay!

New trainer, hard yoga, breathing, and cold

The trainer went well -- I liked her, the workout was challenging, not impossible. I'm tired and my eyes hurt from cedar and I'm a little worried about swimming laps tomorrow -- yes, I know how to swim. I simply require a certain amount of comfort. ;-)

I'll feel better after tomorrow.

Exercise: One hour of weight training, one hour of hatha yoga, thirty minute walk
Craft: Finished the yellow doll
Reading: Black Order, Heart Shaped Box.

Good coffee and handmade dolls

I've been making little handmade dolls for a few months now. I trade them online with folks -- they're nothing fancy, really, just me playing with beads and fabric and thread. Mine are bigger than most -- fat and wide and a little goofy.

We went and bought a bunch of different kinds and strengths of coffee in sample sizes, just to see what we all like the best. It's funny -- I don't like mild coffee at *all*, but if I had to describe it, I'd immediately say it was too strong, not smooth enough.

Oh, I got my birthday present -- a Kindle reader. I *love* it. Love it. I was ambivalent, at best, about the Sony reader, but the Kindle makes me happy. :D I stayed in bed an extra hour this morning and read.

Exercise: Zumba tonight
Crafting: Worked on the entrelac scarf last night, am making a yellow doll today
Reading: Black Order, Heart-Shaped Box

long day, somehow, again

It's cold outside.

 I interviewed a new trainer today and signed up. I don't know; it feels a little weird, really, to spend all this money and time on exercise, but you know what? It works and I felt like she knew her stuff. Also, she's in Round Rock, which works for me.

I need my period to start, then I'll feel better, I think.

I've been thinking about quilts a lot lately -- little ones, art ones. We'll see if I actually *make* one.

Exercise today: Jog for 30 minutes
Reading: Black Order
Crafts: Finished the top of a mini quilt

went back to church today

It's been a long time -- 10 years. The best part? Seeing Carolyn. She's always made my heart happy -- just the fact that she exists makes the world a better place. It was a lot different, a little awkward in that way that going back to somewhere after so long always is.

You could see people wondering why we left -- and the people who asked, I told the truth to. I was so very ill, hurting so badly, that I didn't have the energy and the heart to see other people, to pretend to be whole, to be real. We hunkered down and hid away, using what energy I had for the absolute basics -- raising the child, paying the bills, breathing. It seems odd, I think, because this sort of community is supposed to be about supporting you when you fall, but I didn't have enough of me to be supported anymore. I couldn't accept help or love or care. I couldn't do anything but have faith that one day I'd come through the other side.

I was right. I did.

And I hope that I can find a home in the community again.

Long day

Man, I can't seem to get my shit together today. Everything's backward and hard.

I know that it's hormonal -- I mean, I so get that, but it doesn't make it any easier.

:P

New Years Resolutions

So, I make 'em. Last year, I kept *all* of them.

This year:

1. Go completely dairy-free.
2. Finish the Monster Triathlon in Denton in October.
3. Meet my financial goals.
4. Find a spiritual community and attend.
5. One meatless day per week, while keeping my protein levels.
6. Take one day off work per week.
7. Read 100 books that are *not* work-related in 2010.
8. Post here every day. 

Happy New Year, y'all.